The Islay Beefcast! Episode 02

Left you on a bit of a cliffhanger yesterday didn’t I? No? Either way, don’t worry, we’ll get straight down to business. I’m not going to beat around the bush for comic effect. No siree. That’s just not my style. You know how sometimes when your favourite TV show comes back on the air after a cliffhanger, and they find some way of not resolving that cliffhanger the first week and instead do an episode about something else? Isn’t that annoying? I would never stoop to such tactics. What was I talking about again? Oh yeah…

We were looking for the missing element, the spark, the zing, the punch that would give our podcast that unique flavour. What would it be? Also, we didn’t even have a title for it.

Well, after literally minutes of discussion we found out what it was missing.

Hello sir.

Beef.

Not just any beef though, on no! We got in touch with our old friends at the Islay Beef Consortium, who represent the bovine interests of the fair island of Islay (aisle-ay), Queen of the Hebrides (he-brides) where men wearing wedding dresses walk out to the craggy cliffs and sing shanties to the ocean, before remove their clothing, throwing it up into the piercing winds, and then dancing home in the misty dawn air, before getting dressed for work at the massive Islay Abattoir, where the world’s most Islay-related beef product is produced.

Here then is episode two of what will hereafter be known as, The Islay Beefcast.

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In this episode, we somehow take two whole hours to ramble on about everything under the sun. We talk about our boring jobs, our boring lives, our reaction to the death of Steve Jobs and all the things I hate about Apple. Also films, other podcasts, television, music, books, and of course, beef. Sorry it’s so long, next time we’ll try and cut it down.

Next time we plan to have music, AND a logo! Until then, please enjoy.

Apple: Patent Trolls

You heard me.

Why? Well, here’s one example.

Apple, one of the largest companies in the world, with more money than the US government, cannot stomach competition. The issue here is a patent for how to view photos on a touch phone, that Samsung supposedly violated. What, by increasing the size and allowing you to scroll through them? BUT ONLY APPLE DO THAT! THAT’S THE ONE THING APPLE IS KNOWN FOR! SHOWING PICTURES ON A PHONE. WITH A TOUCH-SCREEN. BECAUSE NO PHONE COULD DO THAT UNTIL THE IPHONE CAME OUT.

AND BY NO PHONE I ACTUALLY MEANT MANY PHONES AND BY UNTIL I MEANT BEFORE.

YES I AM ACTUALLY ANGRY.

Not only this, but apparently you can’t build a “tablet computer” now because even though the iPad is just a giant iPhone sans the phone part, it’s such a unique product. Remember in the 90s when everyone hated Microsoft? When is Apple going to get that level of backlash? Microsoft ended up having to remove features from Windows because of antitrust law. Look at Apple, EVERYTHING they do screams anti-competition – both against competing products and on their own platforms.

Maybe I am just tired of everyone fawning over Apple all day long, but I seriously cannot wait for the day Apple releases that one high-risk product that doesn’t catch on, and they learn a little humility.

EDIT: Wow, a couple hours after posting this, Steve Jobs quit his job. I accept full responsibility for this, but reflect that no one man should have all that power.

More gnus

So, I just got finished with my 13-week mandatory job placement, working full-time for my unemployment benefits. Fortunately, I got lucky and got a great little placement working for Glasgow West Credit Union in Partick. They’re good folks who work in there, even if the actual work part of it wasn’t overly exciting. I didn’t even know what a credit union was until I started working there. It’s an interesting alternative to high street banking, partick-ularly (that horrible pun stolen from a nearby hairdressers’) in the current climate. Anyway, I will be volunteering in there a couple days a week up until I get employment.

Also, Mum’s shop in Perth, Stampaholics, is now closed for business. She’s both saddened and relieved. I went back there to help with the dismantling, but I ended up being used more as a dog-sitter than anything else – which is absolutely fine by me.

I was doing February Album Writing Month, and I got quite a lot of ideas written but not recorded. Plus, about a month ago, my laptop graphics chip died. I’ve now been using the Macbook as my primary computer since then, and though I have mostly adjusted, there’s still a lot I can’t do. My Adobe CS3 is the PC version so I can’t install that, half my VSTs and what not won’t run and I don’t access to much in the way of gaming. It has kind of sidelined about five different projects I was working on, although to be honest it’s not like I was working very hard on them.

My music collection was in WMA too (yeah, I know, I hung on to that boat a bit too long), and my MacBook hard drive won’t take the full library, so I’ve been sporadically ripping everything into iTunes. I don’t like iTunes. It’s fair to say, I am an extreme sceptic when it comes to Apple products. It’s taken me this month of constant use for me to finally get used to using OS X, and I had to actually buy a piece of software AND run a mystical command that it took me hours to find on the internet into the Terminal just to get my fucking mouse to not accelerate, all because Apple don’t put a switch in their control panel. My brain cannot compute how anyone, especially design professionals (the type of people who have been singing Apple’s praises for as long as I can remember), can use a mouse with acceleration turned on. Oh and I really hate window management in OS X. Screw the Dock and screw Finder, give me the Windows 7 taskbar any day. Hell, give me the XP taskbar.

I’ve told myself for a while now, my next computer would be a desktop, but if my Canada plan works out, that limits the usefulness of a desktop. If I did get another laptop, I’d get a bigger desktop-replacement type model. But that’s all moot right now because I don’t have any money. I need a job soon.

Still reading The Stand, about 60% in, but I intend to finish that up fairly quickly now that I’ll have even more free time on my hands. I also read The Wizard of Oz, and a couple other short things.

I desperately need to start saving for a) Canada b) new PC/laptop.